Katrina Angelina, Founder Be the Light International
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Even In my darkest times, there has always been a connection to the light.
Growing up there was abuse and neglect which left me broken. Constantly I felt like I was a burden, not wanted, always in the way; ashamed to be alive. I was unable to make friends and felt very alone in the world. I just wanted to be a part of a family and be loved.
In the grasping for acceptance, I chose a path that led to alcoholic drinking, drug use, jails and suicide attempts. No one knew what to do with me and I had given up on life, I just wanted relief from the pain torturing my heart.
In my twenties, I felt completely lost. My days were fueled by drinking, self-destruction, and relationships that left me feeling empty and without worth. I was diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety, Complex PTSD, and late-stage alcoholism. I reached a point where life itself felt unbearable.
In 2005, my addiction and destructive behavior led me to prison, where I served time for aggravated assault and received treatment for alcoholism. After my release in 2006, I returned to drinking and once again spiraled into despair. I felt unworthy of love, trapped in patterns of trauma, unhealthy relationships, and self-harm through alcohol.
In 2007, I discovered a 12-step program and was able to stay sober for years. It gave me structure and support, but I eventually realized something was missing. I had been looking for external solutions when the real work was inside me--healing the deep wounds of trauma. That realization came during the painful process of my divorce, when I finally began to explore recovery on a deeper level.
I turned to practices that helped me reconnect with myself--meditation, time in nature, and the simple but powerful act of serving others. Through service, I found a sense of meaning that alcohol never gave me. Through nature, I found peace, grounding, and perspective. And through meditation, I learned to quiet my mind, face my pain, and cultivate resilience.
Today, I am 18 years clean and sober. I’m a single mother raising a kind and creative son named Jude, building a career in film, and using my experiences to support others who are navigating addiction, trauma, PTSD, and recovery. In 2022, I was granted a Full Pardon by the Governor of Montana, lifting my past felony charges and reminding me how far I’ve come.
Recovery has taught me that scars are not signs of weakness—they are proof of survival. I have learned that true freedom comes not from numbing pain, but from facing it, healing it, and using it to help others. My path now is to share what I’ve learned, to walk alongside those who feel broken or forgotten, and to create spaces where people can heal together through service, community, and nature.
I have also felt called to expand my recovery journey beyond myself. I earned my private pilot’s certificate to help bring resources and empowerment to communities in need, including a trip to Johannesburg, Africa, where I assisted with medical outreach. My goal is to continue traveling, serving, and telling the stories of resilience I encounter along the way.
I no longer live as a servant to fear, trauma, or the expectations of others. My worth is not defined by my past, but by my ability to grow, to give, and to help others heal.
No one is ever too far gone or too broken to begin again. Recovery is possible. Healing is possible. And every step we take toward helping others is also a step toward strengthening ourselves.
With gratitude,
Katrina Angelina
In the grasping for acceptance, I chose a path that led to alcoholic drinking, drug use, jails and suicide attempts. No one knew what to do with me and I had given up on life, I just wanted relief from the pain torturing my heart.
In my twenties, I felt completely lost. My days were fueled by drinking, self-destruction, and relationships that left me feeling empty and without worth. I was diagnosed with severe depression, anxiety, Complex PTSD, and late-stage alcoholism. I reached a point where life itself felt unbearable.
In 2005, my addiction and destructive behavior led me to prison, where I served time for aggravated assault and received treatment for alcoholism. After my release in 2006, I returned to drinking and once again spiraled into despair. I felt unworthy of love, trapped in patterns of trauma, unhealthy relationships, and self-harm through alcohol.
In 2007, I discovered a 12-step program and was able to stay sober for years. It gave me structure and support, but I eventually realized something was missing. I had been looking for external solutions when the real work was inside me--healing the deep wounds of trauma. That realization came during the painful process of my divorce, when I finally began to explore recovery on a deeper level.
I turned to practices that helped me reconnect with myself--meditation, time in nature, and the simple but powerful act of serving others. Through service, I found a sense of meaning that alcohol never gave me. Through nature, I found peace, grounding, and perspective. And through meditation, I learned to quiet my mind, face my pain, and cultivate resilience.
Today, I am 18 years clean and sober. I’m a single mother raising a kind and creative son named Jude, building a career in film, and using my experiences to support others who are navigating addiction, trauma, PTSD, and recovery. In 2022, I was granted a Full Pardon by the Governor of Montana, lifting my past felony charges and reminding me how far I’ve come.
Recovery has taught me that scars are not signs of weakness—they are proof of survival. I have learned that true freedom comes not from numbing pain, but from facing it, healing it, and using it to help others. My path now is to share what I’ve learned, to walk alongside those who feel broken or forgotten, and to create spaces where people can heal together through service, community, and nature.
I have also felt called to expand my recovery journey beyond myself. I earned my private pilot’s certificate to help bring resources and empowerment to communities in need, including a trip to Johannesburg, Africa, where I assisted with medical outreach. My goal is to continue traveling, serving, and telling the stories of resilience I encounter along the way.
I no longer live as a servant to fear, trauma, or the expectations of others. My worth is not defined by my past, but by my ability to grow, to give, and to help others heal.
No one is ever too far gone or too broken to begin again. Recovery is possible. Healing is possible. And every step we take toward helping others is also a step toward strengthening ourselves.
With gratitude,
Katrina Angelina
SERVICE Trip to Africa for MAF SA Film
Take into account all the work you put into the addiction, then think if you put
half of that much effort into your recovery - where would you be?